If you have seen the brilliant film My Big Fat Greek Wedding a running gag of the bride’s father reads: “Give me a word … any word … and I will prove to you that the origin of this word is Greek!” Somehow he succeeds every time, even though he had to twist logic quite dramatically.
Without the logic twisting, emotional roots work similarly. This is particularly true of stressful emotions, such as anger, grief, depression, guilt, indignation, hatred, self-contempt, rejection, etc. Regardless of which of these feelings it is about, when we go deeper, we always end up with either fear or pain.
Check it out in your everyday life
Try this on a next occasion in your everyday life. Our feelings are triggered by everyday situations and sometimes quite heavily, even with a ridiculous small event. Then pause for a moment and try to feel exactly what it is – is this feeling a fear or a pain? If you think it is something different, then it is a hint that you have to go deeper. At some point you will feel it, and it will be intuitive.
For most of the time, there is no rational justification for it because it was too deeply hidden in the unconscious, and perhaps because it comes from a time when you did not have words for it yet.
Yes, and then?
Then you have the key to healing in your hand. Just allow yourself to feel that pure feeling. Usually, a body sensation is associated with it (pressure, tension, pain, restlessness etc.). Just try to feel this feeling. The mind will probably turn on soon and make a story out of it with justifications, accusations, helplessness, etc. Let those thoughts go, do not go with them, but concentrate only on the original feeling of fear or pain or maybe the body sensation.
It passes and can be cured
If you do this consistently, you will experience that pain or fear begin to dissolve. And then you will experience a new kind of peace. This peace is the basis for love. Love is the basic emotion of all positive emotions. You cannot “make” love (I mean, of course, not the physical love), love comes from itself. It is a gift of life.
This brings us back to the Greek father. Out of love for his fatherland, he has proved to everyone that all the words come from Greek. And every time people laughed from their hearts. Joy is the best expression for love. In this spirit, I wish you all that you will be able to give and receive many moments of joy and love in everyday life and that you may laugh a lot from your heart.
Wolfgang A. Haas